The Holy

some people

like this woman

i remembered today

from my childhood

this

carolyn carlisle

anderson, in

1973

some people

pull you into myth

just

because

they exist

she and her elderly

husband louie

their son paul

(they adopted paul

when he was 9

troubled

youth, etc.)

louie owned a gas station

and they lived across

the street from us

on school street

went to the

same church

landmark bible

carolyn's

super-red deluxe

beauty-salon

hair permed into

a dove's nest

she worked at

the holiday inn

cleaning

rooms

sometimes cooking

for the

buffet, bringing us cottage-cheese

containers

of leftover

green-beans, mashed potatoes,

gravy

from that buffet

and when louie

had the heart attack

they woke me up

to tell me

5-years-old

i guess i needed

to know

right?

carolyn with

pancake makeup

and billy graham

emotions

and paul

in 1975

crazy and mean

and taking drugs

louie could keep

him under

control but

carolyn she

loved him too much

and she was always

coming over

with leftovers

from holiday inn

always trying to

be

nice

and then there's

paul

getting killed in florida 10 years later

after he ran away

carolyn

had nothing

and yet she kept on

with the leftovers

having a job was very important

to her

but paul's bedroom

in that house

damn

that big poster

of led zepelin's

houses of the holy

all those naked

kids climbing

wanting

to get to the top

carolyn

saying to my mom

apologetically

embarrased

isn't that nasty?

i

wish he knew better

i really do